


I'm not with them when I'm with them

by AWomanStabbedMe



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: Bathroom Sex, Eventual Fluff, F/F, Honesty, Jealous Eve Polastri, Jealous Villanelle | Oksana Astankova, Late Night Conversations, Light Angst, Smut, Soft Eve Polastri, Soft Villanelle | Oksana Astankova
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 08:07:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28863786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AWomanStabbedMe/pseuds/AWomanStabbedMe
Summary: Eve storms out after seeing the two ladies leaving Villanelle's apartment and Villanelle gets worried about her.Or i just wanted to explore what happened in jealous Eve's mind
Relationships: Eve Polastri/Villanelle | Oksana Astankova
Comments: 71
Kudos: 199





	1. Jealous Eve

**Author's Note:**

> I don't drink so i don't know how getting drunk works * sorry * 
> 
> Also it's my first time trying to write so I apologise if I made you cringe

Eve stormed out of villanelle's apartment 2 hours ago, not deciding where she's going or why she got angry in the first place all she knew is that she was really mad at villanelle for having not only one but two women and acting so casually about it. 

She didn't want to admit to herself that maybe villanelle didn't owe her anything and still she made an effort to explain to her that "she's not with them when she's with them" in her stupid sexy voice, she didn't want to think about Niko or how he suddenly became a shadow in her life, or bill who should be laughing from heavens at Eve for letting Villanelle get into her head and ruin her like that. 

"God she is a fucking dick" muttered Eve to herself when she realised that she ended up in an inn in the middle of nowhere and she's already ordering her third drink. 

Through her third drink Eve tried to understand what did villanelle mean with what she said, was she thinking of her while being with those women or is she just trying to fuck with her last two functioning brain cells, she wasn't able to continue her self-torture because a message popped up on her screen from villanelle just saying " Eve! " 

Deep down Eve wanted to yell at her, tell her to piss off and never text her again but other part of her just wanted to .. another message popped :- 

V :- Where are you ?!! "  
V :- " Eve, are you dead or something !!!!! " 

Eve sighed and opened her phone, writes and deletes couple of times then finally .. 

Eve :- " Yes Villanelle I am here, unfortunately not dead " 

V:- " Oh God you scared the shit out of me !!! " 

Eve :- " Oh yeah !! As if you would care " 

Eve immediately regretted that and decided to delete that teenage-y reply but apparently it was too late cause villanelle texted back almost immediately. 

V :- " Eve i saw that !! Of course I would care ! " 

Eve :- " ok whatever " 

V :- " where are you ?! " 

Eve :- " Excuse me !! None of your business " 

V :- " Come on Eve you don't seem fine, where are you ?! " 

Finishing her fifth drink Eve thought maybe she really isn't fine. 

Eve :- " I will send you the location .. " 

\- location sent -

V :- " Ok I am on my way ".


	2. Self Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Villanelle's version of what happened since Eve stormed out. 
> 
> Or Villanelle being a good girl for once

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longer chapter cause the first one was too short but I was so anxious of being annoying. 
> 
> Still have no idea how drinking works so don't judge me on that

Villanelle POV 

Villanelle could have never in million years imagine that Eve would get jealous when she sees her with other people, the same Eve who rejected her on every occasion, the same beautiful unfortunately married Eve. 

So when Eve came while those women were still taking a shower Villanelle almost forgot about them, they seemed harmless anyway she didn't think she had to worry about them overhearing anything .. she thought to herself that their ears were probably still ringing of how loud they consecutively screamed her name over and over all night. 

Villanelle was so in her mind trying to find an answer, " You don't feel anything ?! ", she didn't fully ingest it but she heard herself saying " I feel things when I am with you " and before she could further explain or even get a reaction from Eve, lady one came out and damn her for thanking her for the sex cause the air between her and Eve immediately shifted after that. 

Eve tried to play cool so hard that she wasn't cool at all, Villanelle could see through her rage .. " Don't be jealous, i am not with them when I am with them " didn't seem to satisfy Eve and lady two ended any chance Villanelle had and now Eve stormed out and Villanelle has been fidgeting for hours. 

She tried to read through the file Eve gave her so maybe she won't get more angry with her but she just couldn't focus, the whole situation was on replay in her mind till it seemed unreal as if it was all made up by her imagination. 

She didn't know what came up with Eve asking about what she's feeling and getting jealous !!! It was so out of character for her that Villanelle started to get worried, worry was a new feeling for Villanelle she doesn't get worried she's a damn assassin !! But still something felt off. 

And she doesn't even know why would Eve get angry in the first place isn't she the one with a husband !!! She didn't care about him that was obvious but it didn't look like she cared about Villanelle either, like she literally regected her at every corner also stabbed her but that was too complicated to dwell on so she decided that worrying didn't suit her and she gotta do something about it, so she decided to text Eve. 

When Eve didn't reply to her first two messages she knew for sure that something actually was off cause Eve is usually a fast texter so she triple texted till she got a reply that made her get even more worried. 

Villanelle didn't know why she rushed out once Eve sent her the location, she wasn't sure if it was worry, guilt or love that made her put on a jeans, a black undershirt and a coat and take the first taxi she found paying him almost double just to shut up all the way to the inn. 

The inn was small with a bar and a couple of tables so once she got inside she spotted Eve at the bar about to order another drink Villanelle subtly rushed to her to prevent that from happening ... 

Villanelle :- "No sir, Actually she doesn't want another drink." 

The man gave her a confused look then looked at Eve who was looking at villanelle as if she has never seen her before. 

Villanelle :- "I told you she is not ordering", she stared at him for a moment and the man thought it's better to back off. 

Eve :- "what the fuck Villanelle i want another drink."

" How many drinks did you have Eve ?! Said Villanelle while setting next to her. 

Eve :- " Eight, Nine .. hundred, I wasn't counting." 

Villanelle looked at the counter and Eve seemed to be drinking Vodka and that explained the texting. 

Villanelle couldn't resist so she got closer to Eve's ear and whispered " And I thought I was the Russian .. " she found herself smiling softly when Eve parked out a loud laugh that got the attention of some of the customers so Villanelle decided that maybe they shouldn't be grabbing any more attention at the moment, so she started collecting Eve's stuff mobile, wallet and keys putting them in her bag she turned to find Eve with her head on the counter, She batted on her shoulder once, twice .. nothing, Eve was deeply asleep. 

Villanelle paid for God knows how many drinks Eve had and said slightly louder "Hey, hey come on let me take you home", it seemed to be working cause Eve slowly came back to earth and villanelle started helping her to put her coat on and called an Uber for them. 

Villanelle and Eve sat in complete silence and everything sounded so calm and the night air was so gentle through her curls that Eve couldn't resist for long and softly her head started to drop on villanelle's shoulder. 

Villanelle stopped breathing, her body became suddenly hyper aware of Eve invading her space so swiftly, she didn't want to move or even blink, her own heartbeat started slowing down not to bother Eve, She felt a need to keep her comfortable and safe so she scooted slightly closer to give her better access to her shoulder and Eve seemed to drift in a deep sleep again. 

She didn't know where she was supposed to take Eve .. dropping her at her house, ringing the bell and running didn't really seem like a good idea no matter how funny it looked, she wasn't left was so much options so she decided to take Eve to her own apartment and take care of her by herself, at least she was willing to do it without pouring her with questions which would've definitely happened if she took her back to her moustache. 

Villanelle asked the driver to stop few buildings away from her apartment, not that she found him suspicious or anything it was just out of habit, she felt like she's already let her guard way down the whole day and she needed some control.

And as much as she hated it she gently woke Eve up from her nap " Wake up Eve, we are home ", Eve opened her eyes slowly and realized that she's been sleeping on Villanelle's shoulder and Villanelle could swear that she has seen a faint shade of red on her cheeks but the driver stopped and their eternity of staring was interrupted so she simply smiled at Eve and got out of the car, rushed to open Eve's door and started helping her out. 

Villanelle :- " The apartment is just around the corner, it won't be long do you think you can walk ?! " 

Eve simply nodded and seemed to be trying so hard to steady herself so Villanelle decided to offer her arm and for her surprise Eve actually accepted her offer and clinged to her coat silently, the entire walk home was also silent but it wasn't uncomfortable silence .. It just felt right, Everything with Eve felt just right Villanelle thought. 

Couple of minutes and they were standing outside Villanelle's apartment, She got her keys out of her pocket, she opened the door with one hand and kept the other ready behind Eve in case she decided to fall or something .. as the door opened Eve leaned closer and Villanelle took that as a sign to take her directly to bed before her knees totally give up. 

Villanelle guided her to her king sized bed that has witnessed a mind blowing night the day before and gonna witness the weirdest night today she thought, she made Eve set on the bed and helped her out of her coat and guided her head to the pillow " just take some rest okay you're gonna feel better tommorow ", she lifted her legs of the floor and took of her shoes .. then she moved closer to try fix the position of Eve's head on the pillow but eve was surprisingly heavy so she wrapped one arm around her back and the other behind her head and tried to move her higher. 

Eve nuzzled her head into Villanelle's neck and suddenly she was putting soft kisses on her pulse points and Villanelle could swear that it took every bit of self control she has ever had to pull herself away gently from her, Eve opened her eyes and looked at her with a slightly wounded eyes and said " you don't want me anymore " Villanelle's heart was so overwhelmed with emotions that she didn't know what was the right thing to say to wipe that look from Eve's eyes forever .. she placed her hand on Eve's cheek and tried to sound more quite than her heart " I've always wanted you Eve, I still do .. you just didn't seem to want me back " and as much as she tried to cover it with a smile the last phrase made her feel small and bare. 

" Well I want you now " came out as a plea from Eve's sleepy sound and Villanelle's breathing was getting faster she didn't even notice until a tear rolled on her cheek, Eve was offering her the only thing she wanted the thing she's been craving and dreaming of since paris Eve was there weak and bare offering herself to Villanelle but she knew in her heart that she shouldn't, she moved her thumb softly on Eve's cheek " I can't Eve, Not when you're that drunk .. I wish I could but I'm an assassin not a rapist " Villanelle shrugged and Eve seemed to be giving up to sleep so Villanelle put the covers on her and decided to sleep on the couch for the night ... she placed a bin beside the bed, couple of Paracetamols on the counter and a cup of water in case Eve woke up in the middle of the night then she went to have some rest before having to face sober Eve in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter i think i still have some more in me, don't know in which direction yet but it's gonna be fun following these two. 
> 
> Also thanks for your kudos and comments i thought no one would read :'( 
> 
> * Stay Safe *


	3. Honesty is the best policy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know they have to have a real conversation but I thought a sleepy drunk night conversation won't harm ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still Villanelle's POV since Eve is so wasted but i think next chapter is all about Eve's perspective.
> 
> I think i haven't mentioned it before but English is not my first language so any typos is on my teachers .. Enjoy

Villanelle knew that if Eve woke up in the middle of the night and found her lying next to her she will have a heart attack so she decided to have mercy on her and slept on the couch, and before she could finally drift to sleep she made a mental note to contact caroline and suggest changing this damn uncomfortable couch. 

What she didn't expect is Eve almost giving her a heart attack in the middle of the night when she started puking, Villanelle instinctively grabbed her gun till she got closer to the bed and everything came back to her .. this was Eve suffering the consequences of her actions, so she lowered her gun slowly and sat beside Eve who got her head inside the bin and seemed to be dead tired, so she let the gun on the floor beside the bed and held the bin for Eve.

Villanelle started to move her hand slowly up and down Eve's back but then she noticed the falling curls and damn her if she let those curls get dirty so she gently gathered Eve's amazing curls in her hand till she seemed to have nothing more in her guts then she put the bin on the floor and helped her to the bed again and she was about to get back to her insanely uncomfortable couch when Eve held her hand. 

It was so gentle that Villanelle barely felt it, she had to look at their entwined fingers to make sure she wasn't imagining, her train of thoughts was cut when Eve weakly said " Stay ", and as much as she wanted to stay she really wanted to keep the promise she made to herself to not harm Eve not even slightly so she simply said " I can't Eve, you're barely conscious " and she thought Eve was back to sleep till she found her moving slightly to make a room for Villanelle on the bed saying " Not that, you don't have to sleep over there .. it's your bed " said Eve tiredly adjusting herself on the pillow and tugging on Villanelle's hand. 

Villanelle was too weak to resist, she just couldn't say no to this soft caring Eve .. she has rejected her once already and lying next to her won't harm anyone so she got into the bed keeping some space between them but she couldn't miss the warmth that filled her with Eve's closeness even if they weren't actually touching .. Eve with the remaining bits of consciousness was still bold from all that drinking so she decided that she will be the one scooting closer and she rested her head on Villanelle's shoulder in complete silence. 

Villanelle was too sleepy and Eve's hair was too soft against her cheek so she decided to rest her own head on Eve's and just like that they were lying side by side heads resting against each other's as if they haven't spent months of chasing and fighting and stabbing, Damn Eve for making her enjoy stupid things like caring and hugging and sharing the same space with someone ... She made her soft, Villanelle didn't like soft but Oksana loved it and Oksana needed to sleep. 

" Did you like them ?! " Came so suddenly it almost made her jump out of the bed, she moved her head slightly to look at Eve who was barely opening her eyes so she decided that maybe some honesty won't hurt, Eve probably won't remember it anyway. 

" No Eve, I didn't like them .. I like you, I liked you in that hospital's bathroom and I stopped liking anyone else since then " it came so fast it almost felt like her heart was speaking not her throat, then there was the silence again but then " I am sorry I stabbed you, I tried to help you .. but you were gone " came like a whisper and Villanelle didn't know if she liked that drunk apology or not, she didn't even know if she wanted an apology .. she didn't really hate the scar, yes there was the pain and all but it was Eve's and she liked everything that was Eve's.

" I've forgiven you Eve, long time ago " Eve let out a breath of relief then her breath started to get even again but Villanelle decided she wasn't done with being honest. 

V :- " I saw you that day .... " 

Eve:- " hmm ? "

V :- " With Carolyn .. you came to help me, I was in the car with Raymond .. you didn't see me but i saw you and .... I've forgiven you then " 

Villanelle felt a huge weight being left of her chest a weight she didn't even know it existed so she started to gently play with Eve's curls and Eve didn't reject her touch so maybe honesty isn't that bad after all, she wasn't sure if Eve was awake or not till Eve gently pressed a peck to her chin and nuzzled her head into her Neck and went back to sleep. 

Villanelle knew that they have so much to talk about, so much to confess and too much to forgive .. She didn't even know what to expect when Eve wakes up, all she knew is that what she was feeling for Eve was real, it wasn't a chasing game anymore she wanted Eve and she wanted Eve to want her back, so before drifting to sleep herself she made a promise to prove to Eve that she can be good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanna thank you guys for reading and commenting it actually gives me more ideas so keep the suggestions coming. 
> 
> Also i am sorry for updating too often i just got ideas lol 
> 
> * Stay Safe *


	4. Let's just Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eve and Villanelle have a decent human conversation with no knifes and a gun * it's not what you think I promise *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Daily ideas keeps popping in my brain so here's another update for you guys <3

Eve's head felt so heavy in the morning, her eyelids fought with her for 30 mins just to finally open, she touched the other side of the bed and Villanelle wasn't there, her side was cold so maybe she left awhile ago .. maybe she panicked after Eve kissed her or maybe it was asking her for sex, God I really asked her to fuck me thought Eve to herself when Villanelle opened the bathroom door freeing an excessive amount of steam and covered only in her towel, her hair was still dripping and some droplets were still hanging on her skin. 

Eve tried so hard not to stare .. she really really tried but Villanelle looked like a fucking goddess, her skin was glowing and her hair was so thin and yet so golden, she looked so vulnerable and defenseless and Eve accidentally made the mistake of trying to hide her staring by looking at the side of the bed where the gun was left last night. 

V :- " Don't get any ideas Eve, you already ruined my bikini body " 

Eve :- " Mm no I am not .. I am sorry, I didn't mean to, I am really not gonna ... " She kept fidgeting and rambling till Villanelle went to set beside her on the bed. 

Villanelle put her fingers on Eve's and calmly almost sarcastically said " Breath Eve, I know you're not gonna ruin this beautiful body anymore .. I think you started to have better plans " and was that a wink or was Eve imagining cause now she's getting pissed but she knows she started all this. 

Eve said " Haha, really funny ... And no I don't have other plans " but she knew that her cheeks was bloody red so she started to move her fingers through her hair for a distraction. 

Villanelle gave her an offended look that got her rolling her eyes 

Eve :- " Okay fine .. I know I asked you for sex yesterday, I was very drunk " 

Villanelle :- " Yes, I noticed ... So you aren't actually sorry for stabbing me ?! " 

Eve got lost in Villanelle's narrowed eyes, she was sorry about stabbing her .. god she was immediately sorry seconds after doing it, she kept having nightmares about paris for months and now that she said sorry Villanelle doesn't believe her !!

Eve :- " I know you won't like it but I am actually sorry " 

Villanelle :- " Why wouldn't I like it ?! " 

Eve :- " The first time I tried to do it ... In my home, that arsenic joke night, Remember " 

Villanelle :- " Yeah .. " 

Eve :- " You seemed disgusted, I think it makes me weak in your eyes, No ?! " Eve swallowed harder than she intended and Villanelle must have noticed cause she looked the other way for a moment as if to give Eve a minute to breathe. 

Villanelle :- " Do you want me to be honest ?! " 

Eve :- " Please .. " 

Villanelle :- " Back then yes I was slightly disgusted ... When you stabbed me it really hurt .. It hurt me twice, Once for the physical pain and twice for liking you, But when I stopped bleeding when I was no longer angry with you, I looked at it and it reminded me of you .. I looked at in London and there was you, I looked at it in Denmark and you were there too .. It made you with me all the time so I liked it " 

Villanelle seemed to be thinking about her upcoming words and Eve tried to be as silent as she could so she just kept staring at her. 

Villanelle :- " When you was about to apologise that night I was still chasing you, I was ordered to kill you and you was apologising to me !!! You're really strange Eve .. I could've killed you that night but you were just so sure, You trusted me .. I had a fucking dagger and you trusted me " 

Eve :- " I mean when you say it like that it does sound insane ... " Eve felt slightly shy by her own behaviors and she was no longer able to stare so she just looked everywhere but Villanelle. 

Villanelle :- " But it was so fucking brave Eve, stabbing me, hiring me to kill you, sleeping next to me ... Those are really brave things Eve, I think no one else has ever dared to do them " Villanelle looked at the floor and Eve knew what was coming and it came " At least not someone who knew what I am " shrugged Villanelle in defeat and Eve was wrestling with her own body not to go and hug her. 

Eve :- " Well I think I am not like other people then ... " 

Villanelle :- " Thank God you aren't, people are fucking boring " and with that Villanelle's mood seemed to be just fine again, Eve was always amazed with how fast she could jump from one emotion to another, She made it look so effortless. 

Eve :- " So you are no longer disgusted with my apology ?! What changed ?! " She couldn't resist asking.

Villanelle :- " I did, you changed me Eve .. I don't want to chase you anymore .. " 

Eve :- " Oh so you hate me now ... " Said Eve jokingly. 

Villanelle :- " No actually quite the contrary .. " 

Eve tried to search for the lies and manipulation in Villanelle's words she tried to see the bullshit behind her eyes but she found non .. her heart's panic seemed to be haunting her face cause Villanelle moved awkwardly towards the cupboard and faked being busy with picking her clothes. 

Villanelle :- " But yes if you are still guilty about the stabbing don't be, I have forgiven you. " Said Villanelle putting her shirt on and taking the towel off slowly so Eve looked the other side instinctively. 

Eve :- " I think i should go, Nik ... " 

Villanelle raised her eyebrow and Eve remembered that Niko won't actually be waiting at home anymore. 

Eve :- " I mean I have some work before Rome .. i want to make sure everything is ready " 

Villanelle :- " Relax Eve guys like Aron are so empty .. he's not as scary as you think " 

" But we still gotta be careful " said Eve following Villanelle to the kitchen. 

Villanelle :- " Okay boss we're going to do it your way, just let me make you breakfast first " 

Eve :- " Oh, you can cook ?! " 

Villanelle :- " You're not the only one with knife skills Eve .. " 

Eve :- " Oh come on when are you gonna drop it ?! " Said Eve lightly. 

Villanelle :- " I did, I promise .. I just love teasing you " laughed Villanelle. 

And Eve's heart started acting funny, she felt free .. free from fear, free from work, free from Niko and free from her herself .. Villanelle made her feel a lightness she never expected to feel and especially not with Villanelle whose cooking seemed to be as good as her looks cause the apartment started to smell like coffee and seasoned hotdogs. 

" Thank you Villanelle " said Eve suddenly and Villanelle looked at her questionably. 

Eve :- " For taking care of me yesterday, I know I was a mess and you didn't leave me, so thank you " 

Villanelle :- " You're welcome Eve, It's nothing " waved Villanelle with her hand. 

Eve decided to prepare the table as Villanelle seemed to be finished with the plates they sat opposite each other in comfortable silence, Eve took her first bite of sausage and almost moaned of how good it tasted, she raised her head from the plate to find expecting eyes starring at her. 

Eve :- " I loved it, it's really good .. you used some seasoning but i can't know what it is but it tastes so good " 

Villanelle :- " Thanks Eve, well it's not one thing .. it's a hack I learned in Syria, you add a little bit of Black pepper, chilli pepper and the secret ingredient oregano powder and you just mix it well, and you get this magical sausage " 

Eve :- " Well it's actually so good thanks for the tip. " 

Villanelle tilted her head pleased with her self and Eve got into her head again, Villanelle is not really the monster everyone thinks she is .. she really wanted to know her, what made her who she is and why is she so changed since the hospital .. Even her face looks different Eve thought. 

Villanelle :- " Ehmm, I want to ask you something Eve .. " 

Eve kinda new where this conversation was heading, she knew this question was inevitable so she looked at Villanelle expectantly waiting for her to ask it. 

Villanelle :- " What happened yesterday, I mean why did you get so angry ?! " 

Eve didn't know what to say, she didn't know how to explain to Villanelle that she felt jealous when she got no right to be, she felt jealous over a woman she's not even ready to be with, a woman she doesn't even know for sure won't kill her at some point .. Eve was married and she was a bloody MI6 agent who is falling for the assassin she's supposed to be catching so how can she explain to her why she got so pissed without sounding pathetic. 

Eve :- " Well, I wish there was an easy answer for this Villanelle but honestly I don't know .. I was pissed when I saw them, I don't know why .. I know I got no right to be but honestly I was, I didn't like seeing you with those two women and I kept thinking of what happened. " 

Eve got silent for awhile just looking at Villanelle who was so obviously confused. 

Villanelle :- " You kept thinking about the sex !! " 

Villanelle looked confused and Eve knew she got every right to be, Eve herself was confused and she knew she owed her an explanation. 

Eve :- " Well, not specifically but yes I kept thinking whether you liked them or not " 

Villanelle :- " Well I answered that yesterday didn't I ?! " 

Villanelle seemed to be making sure that Eve has heard her yesterday and wasn't actually asleep. 

Eve :- " Yes I know ... I just don't have other explanation, I am sorry I caused you trouble yesterday " 

Villanelle placed her hand over Eve's and smiled softly. 

Villanelle :- " I told you Eve it was nothing ... " 

Villanelle got interrupted by a notification from her own phone she looked at it for a while then said " It's Carolyn she wants us at hers in two hours, she's asking about you too "  
Eve left her chair and went to her bag, she found two missed calls from caroline and 10 notifications on her what's app she looked at Villanelle and said " She called me twice, Carolyn never calls .. She is gonna kill me " 

" Do you think we should go ?! " Said Villanelle apparently concerned. 

Eve :- " Yeah, yeah .. I mean Carolyn might be scary but I don't think she is gonna actually kill me besides she says hugo, Kenny and konstantin are gonna be there too " 

Villanelle :- " Oh, A group meeting .. This must be important " 

" I guess so yes " said Eve setting back on her chair 

Villanelle :- " Should I call us an Uber ?! " 

Eve :- " Well I don't think we should be going together you know, it's gonna look weird. " 

Villanelle raised her eyebrow but then said " Well you're kinda right I will call two, You go first and 15 mins and I'll follow you .. I like showing up late " 

" Expected " laughed Eve despite not knowing what to expect from Carolyn but having Villanelle by her side made her feel protected .. She knew that no matter what, Villanelle was not going to hurt her and that ended months of concerns and nightmares .. They seemed to be on the same side for the first time and that felt nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading so far and thank you for the support it actually means a lot to me <3 
> 
> Jealous V is coming i promise and the sausage thing is just a personal preference it's good try it ;) 
> 
> I missed the others too so I am gonna have some Caroline, konstantin, hugo and Kenny content next chapter ... Suggestions are so welcome tho. 
> 
> * Stay Safe *


	5. Meetings with no biscuits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pre-Rome meeting at Carolyn's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading guys it really means a lot.

The entire ride to Caroline's was so clam, Eve's mind was surprisingly quite .. After what happened in the past few hours and the amount of confessions she and Villanelle made she expected that once she got away from Villanelle's spell she will get back to herself .. That her moral compass will kick her and her guilt is gonna eat her from the inside out, But this all didn't happen .. she didn't even dwell much on what Carolyn will say. 

The car stopped at Carolyn's and Eve stood for a while outside as if waiting for Villanelle, as if she should've just shown up with her and fuck everyone's assumptions .. Finally she rang the bill and was greeted with Kenny's usual shy smile.

" Hello, Eve. " Smiled Kenny awkwardly and continued " Mom was worried about you, Where have you been ?! " 

Eve :- " Well, I was just a little bit tired and though ... " 

Carolyn :- " Oh, Eve .. You finally showed up .. nice to see you alive. " 

Eve :- " Thanks Carolyn .. i was just telling Kenny, I just had some personal issues and needed a small break " .. Eve hoped that no signs of hangover are showing on her cause she didn't want to explain further. 

Kenny seemed uncomfortable by the silence but didn't know what to say so Carolyn finally ended the waiting " Well, I understand .. Come on in, Don't want to leave hugo alone much " 

Kenny :- " I'll just get my laptop from upstairs and follow you .. Are we starting without Konstantin and Villanelle ?! " 

Carolyn :- " No, they're going to show up .. Right Eve ?! " 

Eve :- " I suppose so yes " 

Eve followed Carolyn to the kitchen and sensed that carolyn somehow knew exactly where she was last night, maybe she shouldn't have answered immediately after carolyn texted Villanelle .. god she made it too obvious that they were together but Carolyn seems to have her share of unexplained affairs she didn't press on the subject any further. 

Eve was deep in her thoughts when hugo came closer to her and just went like " Booo .. " in her ears. 

Eve :- " What the fuck Hugo Are you six ?! " 

" No boss I am no longer a minor .. " said hugo with a wink, " What were you thinking about so deeply tho ?! Is it your psychopath girlfriend ?! " 

Eve :- " Will first of all she's not a psychopath and secondly she's not my girlfriend. " 

Hugo :- " Oh she's not !! So why were you thinking about her ?! " Hugo raised his eyebrow and grinned knowingly and Eve hated how right he was and unlike Carolyn he seemed to feed on gossip and he got her trapped. 

Eve was relieved when the bell rang and konstantin entered the room with Carolyn and Kenny who finally got downstairs to give hugo someone else to tease. 

Carolyn sat on the head of the table, konstantin on her left, Eve on her right .. then hugo next to Eve and Kenny next to konstantin leaving only another chair on the other head of the table and they sat in silence waiting for Villanelle. 

Carolyn :- " Seems like the twelve doesn't train their assassin's to respect other people's time. " 

Konstantin laughed loudly to that " She's going to show up .. she just likes to be annoying. " 

Hugo :- " Well apparently she's quite annoying already. " 

" Oh kid you didn't even meet her yet " laughed konstantin again while Eve and Kenny exchanged some worried stares, Eve assumed that Kenny was scared from the mere idea of Villanelle showing up in his house but Eve was scared on the contrary that Villanelle won't show up at all. 

The uncomfortable small talk was interrupted with the bell ringing, Hugo seemed to be the only one excited to go open the door for Villanelle. 

Hugo :- " Hi, I am hugo .. you must be the famous Villanelle. " 

Villanelle was so not in the mood for Hugo, She just wanted to see Eve so she smiled coldly and said " And you must be Hugo. ", "Yes, that's indeed me. " Said hugo while showing her into the room. 

Villanelle was expectedly over-dressed for a kitchen meeting, she was wearing a black suit that seemed to has no undershirt cause it was showing some cleavage with no sign of any more fabrics, her hair was in a messy but annoyingly hot bun and of course she was wearing heals. 

Villanelle entered the room smiling as if she's not 30 mins late and the last one to show up, She noticed Eve's eyes trying subtly to check her on but God Eve was so bad at being subtle so Villanelle smiled even more. 

Villanelle :- " Konstantin, Hiii .. Glad to see you alive. " 

Konstantin :- " Haa ha, I am the one who's glad Aron hasn't killed you yet .... " 

Carolyn :- " Villanelle, How kind of you to finally join us ! " 

" Quite kind actually, You woke me up with your texts. " said Villanelle dramatically setting down on the head of the table. 

Carolyn :- " Oh, How bad ?! And i thought you were up regarding how fast you replied. " 

Eve swallowed hardly when carolyn looked at Villanelle for a while then at Eve then as if she decided to not let Villanelle into her mind she finally started .. " Well I know we've agreed on not meeting until Rome but there has been quite a change that we needed to update you on personally .. Kenny ?! 

Kenny :- " Yes, so you guys know that Aron is quite a creepy guy .. he's literally a ghost, nothing to hack or stalk at all .. so I've been working on the very few data we have and i found something quite disturbing. " 

Kenny turned the laptop so the four of them could see, it was a video of a girl sleeping for a while then Aron shows up with something in his hand apparently an injection, he injects the girl who tries to resist but seems to faint almost immediately then he takes out a knife and cuts her neck with no hesitation and the video cuts. 

Eve's heart dropped and she immediately looked at Villanelle who was still focused on the black screen, " So we wanted to inform you that Aron is not going to be quite as easy to deal with as we thought. " said carolyn. 

Eve :- " Quite easy ?!!!! Are you kidding me ?!!! He might as well be a fucking cannibal !! " 

Konstantin :- " I think this is really probable. " 

Villanelle looked unusually silent but she didn't look a bit scared and Eve wished she could just read her mind to know what is going on in there. 

Villanelle :- " Well excuse me guys but I don't actually see what is so new about this video, Have you even seen the guy ?!!! I knew he was a psycho the moment he opened his mouth and I know much about being a psycho as you know. " 

Carolyn :- " We're fully aware of your capabilities Villanelle but we think it would be better if you walked in knowing exactly what was waiting for you. " 

Kenny :- " We think you need to be more careful when you're sleep .. since you won't be able to take a weapon. " 

Villanelle :- " I won't ?! " 

Eve :- " Yes Villanelle you already know that !!!! " 

Villanelle :- " I mean " not " conventional weapon .. something that won't be considered a weapon, a shaving blade for example. " 

Carolyn :- " Well we won't actually mind you shaving your lady parts ... " 

Eve raises an eyebrow at Carolyn but Villanelle seemed to be grinning subtly.

Carolyn :- " But you must know no matter how many - Not conventional - weapons you have, You mustn't kill Aron under any circumstances .. Is that clear ?! " 

Villanelle :- " But you don't mind me hospitalizing him if he gets creepy ?! " 

Carolyn :- " No, As long as he stays alive I don't see any problem with self-defense. " 

Konstantin :- " But you must always remember you're not contracted to kill him Villanelle just get the informations and get out, don't fool around. " 

" I won't kill him, pinky promise " Villanelle smiled innocently but Carolyn and konstantin didn't seem to buy it but they had nothing else but to hope that Villanelle is actually listening. 

Kenny :- " Villanelle ... " 

Villanelle grinned at him and almost laughed at how scared he looked but she gave him a focused look as if to say I am listening. 

Kenny :- " I have prepared your ear piece, it's quite small but not too small .. it's not really an ear piece tho it's not like a headphone it's a mic that will transfer sounds to Eve and Hugo .. " 

Villanelle :- " Oh so they will hear me but i won't hear them ?! " 

Kenny :- " Exactly yes " 

Villanelle :- " And why is that ?! " 

Eve :- " Villanelle ... " 

Kenny :- " I mean because if they made a noise Aron might hear it and you might get exposed ! " 

Villanelle gave Eve a look then said " Well that's quite smart kenny, you can't expect what noises might happen " she give him a scandalous look and Kenny turned red and tried hard to continue " Well we have been informed that Aron's Rome house has quite strong security system so you would have to hide it till you go in .. And we suggest you take it in your contraceptive pills cause it would be least suspicious ?! " 

" That will be fun to see. " Laughed konstantin. 

Villanelle :- " Shut up konstantin i won't be having sex with that pervert. " 

Konstantin :- " I thought you liked them a little creepy don't you ?! " 

Villanelle :- " No, I am into nice people now. " 

Hugo :- " Ohhh, Nice people or Nice women ?! " 

Eve :- " Hugo who raised you ?!!! " 

Villanelle :- " Don't worry about it shit head you don't have a chance either way. " 

" Okay okay, I was asking for a friend " winked hugo at Eve who wanted to shoot him in the head and carolyn felt that there's no need for this picking before Rome so she started " So, I think we're quite done here .. We wish you good luck tomorrow, stay alert all the time, get the informations and get out" 

Konstantin :- " Well i should be leaving, I have to pick up Irina from the airport. " 

Villanelle :- " That shit is coming to London !! Tell her I said 嗨狗屎头 " 

Konstantin waved at her on his way out and Kenny took his laptop and on his way out he wished Eve good luck and gave her an awkward hug .. Hugo and Villanelle was on their way out and Eve was about to follow them when Carolyn said " Eve, Can I have a word with you ?! " 

She looked at Villanelle and Hugo who looked at her questionably but she moved towards carolyn anyway. 

Carolyn :- " I Know quite well that you're the only person that can control her Eve, So she Mustn't kill Aron and that's your responsibility. " 

Eve :- " Yes carolyn i understand, Did you book our tickets ?! 

Carolyn :- " Yes kenny has arranged everything for you and Hugo, don't worry about it. " 

Eve :- " Ok, I will leave now, is there anything else ?! " 

Carolyn :- " No, you can go .. good luck Eve " 

Eve followed Villanelle and Hugo who were waiting for her by the door and once the door closed the three of them sighed in unison. 

Villanelle :- "God, She's quite bossy " 

Eve :- " Quite !! She's Extremely bossy .. but that's kinda her charm " 

Hugo :- " Wow, You're into Milfs now Eve !!! " 

" God, just shut up god you're so annoying " laughed Eve 

Hugo :- " Would you guys be interested in going to some club ?! I mean a goodbye-London party. " 

" I mean we shouldn't be hanging out together that would be extremely dumb. " said Eve looking at Villanelle who looked interested. 

Hugo :- " Well it's a gay club I don't think that Aron would be interested in that. " 

Villanelle :- " Well this sounds fun shit head, what do you think Eve. " 

Eve :- " Well if you wanna go I don't mind " 

Hugo smiled to the ground as all his suspicions seemed to be confirmed, then he called them an Uber and off they went to celebrate their last night before Rome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 嗨狗屎头 = Hi shit head 
> 
> * I don't speak mandarin so if it's wrong blame it on Google translate and bing * 
> 
> Jealous Villanelle and earning the Mature rating is coming next so get ready.


	6. I have a thing for bathrooms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The three musketeers go to celebrate their last night in London but things get nasty. 
> 
> Or the long waited Jealous Villanelle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * This is my first ever smut so judge me but kindly *

The bar was couple of blocks away ... Hugo sat next to the driver, Eve and Villanelle sat next to each other in the back, not as close as their last taxi drive but the comfort of each other's existence was still there .. The stolen glances was also there, not just between the two of them but also from Hugo who kept looking at them every once in a while like they were some kind of newly weds .. The whole situation made Eve nervous but made Villanelle more cocky, Eve was there next to her .. Going to a gay club probably for the first time in her life just because Villanelle wanted her to and that was beyond any progress Villanelle thought she could have with Eve. 

Hugo seemed to know the guys at the entrance so it was easy getting in, Not that it would've been hard for Villanelle to use her charm to get in but she wanted to be as subtle as possible before Rome. 

Hugo entered the loud glittery club, Villanelle behind him and Eve was taking small steps behind her, Villanelle felt the hesitation in Eve's steps and instinctively grabbed her hand and got closer to her ear " Get out of your head Eve, it's gonna be fun. " Eve glanced at their hands for a moment and seemed to get slightly more relaxed. 

Hugo ordered them the first round, then Villanelle the second and by the third Eve was taking off her coat and getting into the mode so she started moving to the beats, Villanelle was enjoying the company of that care-free Eve till hugo stood up and offered her to dance with him. 

Eve having no good reason to refuse stood up looking at Villanelle who gave her a nod and a smile that didn't seem to be heartfull but Hugo was tugging on her hand and she followed him and got into the dancing crowds. 

Villanelle wanted to stab Hugo, she thought of breaking her bottle and cutting off his neck, It has never happened to her that someone dared to take someone that's hers, not even make eye contact with them and this shit head took not anyone but Eve to dance and he's putting his hand on her back, swaying with those hips and holding her as if she was his, god the ways she could turn his life into a living hell .. And why would Eve say yes ?!! Why didn't she ask Villanelle to dance with her instead ?!!! Villanelle doesn't get jealous, not from a man at least but maybe tonight she's and that's not good for everyone around. 

Eve and Hugo was on their way back to their seats laughing and sweating untill Eve noticed how quite Villanelle was, her cheeks were red and her eyes seemed cold and distant .. Eve tried to put her hand on Villanelle's but she moved it away and stood up " I am going to the bathroom ". 

Villanelle needed to get out of the situation, she needed to get as far from Hugo as possible or she's gonna kill him and ruin everything .. she washed her face and tried to breath when Eve entered the bathroom getting closer to her. 

Eve :- " Hey, What's going on .. you don't seem fine. " 

Villanelle :- " Nothing is happening I am perfectly fine, you're the one who's sweating ! " 

Eve :- " Is it about me dancing w .. " 

Two women entered the bathroom and they started talking loudly so Eve dragged Villanelle into one of the toilet rooms and closed the door ... Eve stood in the middle of the really small space they had and Villanelle had her back against the opposite wall to stay as far as possible from Eve. 

" Is it about me dancing with Hugo Villanelle ?! " asked Eve with a confused look. 

Villanelle :- " Yes, Eve .. it's about you dancing with that shit head like you're love birds !! " 

Eve knew that Villanelle had tons of unexpected traits but being jealous wasn't one of them, or at least that's what she thought .. Villanelle was always the most beautiful person in any room, the best dressed, the most secure .. she was basically out of any competition cause no one was able to compete. 

Eve smiled and finally said " Villanelle did you get jealous ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Jealous !! Of who ?!! Hugo !!! " 

Eve :- " Yes, because he danced with me and was all over m ... " 

Villanelle pushed Eve by the shoulder towards the other wall, she wasn't able to keep herself under control anymore .. she expected Eve to get scared, scream for help or at least fight but she looked at Eve's eyes and they were getting darker. 

" He doesn't get to touch you Eve, you're not his." Said Villanelle looking Eve in the eyes as if to dare her to resist, but Eve didn't she moved closer to Villanelle so they were meeting eye to eye despite her trapped shoulders, " Then whose person am I Villanelle ?! Yours ?! " 

Villanelle wanted to say yes she really did but she knew whatever this was that she shouldn't take it so far or she will freak Eve out .. But when she took too long to answer the decision wasn't hers any more cause Eve moved to her neck and kissed her softly at first in no particular spot then she found herself a pulse point and started sucking and biting, Villanelle released and accidental soft moan and felt Eve grinning against her neck. 

Villanelle wanted back her control so she softly pushed Eve against the wall and said " Are you sure that's what you want Eve ?! " 

Eve surprised by the shift in their dynamic only nodded and Villanelle was everywhere, she started with her jaw moving lower towards her neck trying to get as much access as she could despite of the turtleneck, she kissed and sucked for a while then licked her way up the other jaw, she started to get slower her lips inches away from Eve's, She seemed small and soft and Eve didn't want her to get into her mind again so she crashed their lips together, they kissed feverishly at first then Eve opened her mouth to welcome Villanelle's warm tongue then their kisses got deeper and slower .. Villanelle seemed to be taking her time to taste every inch of Eve's lips as if it's a meal and she has been starving for weeks. 

Villanelle's hand started hovering over Eve's body while kissing her, she got down from shoulders to slightly squeezing Eve's boobs and Eve started producing the sweets of moans and Villanelle wanted to hear them forever so her right hand found its way to Eve's trousers and single handedly opened it's button and zipper then before doing what she's been dying to do since paris she said " Can I ?! " Eve nodded again but Villanelle said " I need to hear it Eve. " 

" Yes Villanelle Please do it " said Eve almost gasping when Villanelle waited no more second to get into her underwear and took her time to explore Eve, and Eve was already about to explode from being touched so agonisingly " You're so wet Eve, Is that for me ?! Said Villanelle drawing fast circles around her clit and Eve's moans started to get louder but she managed to get a " Yes .. " out of her lips before Villanelle started teasing her entrance and she was dying for those fingers to get inside her but Villanelle seemed to be enjoying the teasing game and Eve was going to explode so she gasped " Please Villanelle .. " 

Villanelle said "Please What ? " already smiling on what's coming, " Please fuck me " and again Villanelle wasted no time getting her fingers that were already dripping with Eve's wetness inside Eve, she started with two fingers moving them slowly in and out and everytime Eve was close to get impatient she increased the pace till she was slamming her fingers inside Eve and making it more and more harder for Eve to control her moans. 

" More please " came between Eve's gasps as a plea but Villanelle said " Not before you tell me whose person are you Eve ?! " .. Eve was ready to give Villanelle whatever she wanted just to have more pressure just a little more so she said as loudly as she could in a public bathroom " Yours .. All yours " and with that Villanelle was starting to feel her own witness and was done with the teasing so she added another finger and started slamming them hardly against Eve and they moaned softly in unison tell Villanelle felt Eve's walls tightening against her fingers then Eve buried her moans into Villanelle's shoulder and came all over her hand. 

Villanelle guided Eve slowly through her orgasm till she took out her fingers and Eve kept hanging on her strong shoulders for a moment but she already ached for Villanelle's absence more than she should till Villanelle started licking her fingers slowly one by one looking Eve in the eyes and Eve was wet all over again .. she was getting ready to touch Villanelle when a voice from outside asked " Is Everything okay ?! Do you need help in there ?! " 

Villanelle said looking at Eve who was closing her pants " No my friend was vomiting but she's fine now, we will be out in a minute. " 

Lady Stranger :- " Sure yeah take your time. " 

Villanelle got closer to Eve and whispered " Do you wanna continue in my apartment ?! " And without hesitation Eve said " Yes " so Villanelle grabbed her hand and in a minute they were out in a taxi forgetting the poor Hugo they left at the bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it so far, and thank you for reading and commenting it means a lot. 
> 
> We still have one chapter before Rome tho 
> 
> Also my brother, Sister and cousin are Covid positive so keep them in your thoughts please and stay safe ♥️


	7. Best Wishes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eve and Villanelle making up for Paris before they fly to Rome. 
> 
> Or honestly it was going to be rough sex but then I dreamt of them being all soft and goofy so i woke up and chose softness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading so far ❤️

Villanelle had plans to fuck Eve blind all night long, she didn't give a fuck about the plane she had to catch with Aron early in the morning or the warnings carolyn and kenny gave her .. She finally had Eve and she is far from getting enough, She wanted to teach her what pleasure is, she wanted to kiss and suck and lick all night long. 

But little did she know that Eve had another plan in her head, so when they entered the room and Villanelle thought she had the power taking Eve's clothes off and letting Eve take hers off she felt like her plans is coming to action so she started kissing Eve feverishly tell they arrived at the bed not breaking their clumsy kisses unless they needed to take off another piece of clothes till both of them were only in their bras and panties. 

But then Eve suddenly pushed Oxana to the bed softly and climbed slowly on her .. Villanelle was surprised by the sudden change of their dynamic but who was she to deny Eve her desired so she adjusted herself on the pillow and moved her hands softly on Eve's thighs before asking in a raspy voice " So, what no Eve ?! ". 

Eve planted a soft slow kiss to her lip and then moved to her ears and whispered " Now I am gonna make love to you ", Eve started planting kisses all the way from her ears to her neck and Oxana found herself losing every form of power she thought she had .. her breath started getting deeper and soft moans started escaping her throat and everytime they did Eve took it as a sign that she was doing good. 

Eve took her time kissing and licking on Oxana's neck and from time to time she planted deep kisses on her lips but then got back to her mission to explore Oxana's body, then she kissed all the way down to her chest kissing each mole individually, she moved her hands to Oxana's back specifically touching the back of her bra as if asking for permission .. Oxana who seemed drunk in softness raised her back just a little and looked Eve in the eyes to see them as dark as the night when Eve took off her bra and threw it to the ground. 

Villanelle was so nervous of how vulnerable she looked bare chested in front of Eve, she was far from shy but it was Eve who is stairing at her naked boobs and suddenly she felt insecure she was terrified that Eve won't like to go any further, she was relieved when Eve finally broke her silent observing and said " God, You're a fucking goddess. " And then she was everywhere sucking on one nibble and teasing the other .. Villanelle's moans started to get louder and she felt as if she was gonna come just from having Eve licking and kissing her boobs like that. 

Eve started to go lower kissing over her heart, her stomach till she reached the scar and seemed to hesitate .. she looked at Villanelle, puzzled not knowing if she's allowed to touch it or is it way too intimate, even more than the rest of her body. 

" It's okay Eve i told you I have forgiven you. " Said Oxana after she was finally able to take her breath for a moment. 

Eve moved carefully around the scar, she touched it with her finger tips .. it was slightly raised despite being completely healed, it was rough under her touch it didn't belong to this soft skin but the touch didn't seem to hurt Villanelle cause she was just watching curiously .. Eve gave a short kiss to the scar and Villanelle gasped softly, Eve repeated the motion again and again then whispered to the scar " I am sorry. " Then started licking it looking villanelle in the eyes, villanelle was going to combust Eve was way way better than her fantasies and it made her defenseless. 

Eve moved lower after she made sure she gave the scar all the attention it needed then kissed on villanelle fancy panties before taking them off, Eve explored villanelle's folds cautiously at first then she started to have a rhythm moving her tongue up and down teasing her entrance for a second every lick and Oxana's head started rising and falling again on the pillow, Eve was going too slow and it was driving her mad but she loved it too ???! .. Eve drew circles on Oxana's clit with her fingers and then without warning digged her tongue deep inside Oxana who literally screamed with pleasure Eve moved in and out for a moment then she switched positions sucking on villanelle's clit and entering her with two fingers .. villanelle opened up to her and gasped " more, please " so Eve added a third fingers and after a minute of in and out movement villanelle's entire body tensed up and her walls hugged Eve's fingers as she came embarrassingly fast but Eve guided her through her orgasm then slowly got her fingers out of a panting villanelle, she gave her a short kiss on the lips then she slept next to her in silence. 

Oxana took a couple of minutes to recover, she kept breathing deeply for a moment then she said " I don't usually come that fast you know, but that was just ... " She let out a short laugh to cover up her embarrassment. 

Eve :- " Well I don't usually fuck women so .. i guess tonight is all about new stuff. " 

" Well you're too good for a first time. " said Oxana looking at Eve for a while then she started again " Can I lay on your chest Eve ?! ", Eve looked at her for a moment and Oxana was too terrified she's gonna reject her so she started again " well, you don't have to if you don ... " but then Eve kissed her shoulder softly and said " No, no come here " and adjusted herself to let villanelle lie at the crook of her neck. 

Eve :- " Villanelle ... " 

Villanelle :- " Hmm ... " 

Eve :- " You're gonna be careful tomorrow right, i mean with Aron and All. " 

Villanelle kissed her neck and said " Yes, Eve i will be careful. " and then her breathing started to get deeper and Eve decided to give up to sleep too so she she put her fingers in villanelle's hair and rested her chin on her head and started to sleep herself. 

Villanelle woke up before Eve, she moved as slowly as she could, not to wake her up .. she took a shower and got dressed then she sat an alarm for Eve who seemed to forget doing so last night and then gave her a last glance and went on her way.

Eve woke up two hours later on an alarm she didn't even remember setting, she clumsily turned it off when her hand touched a folded piece of paper under it, she opened it and it read " Good morning beautiful, last night was perfect .. Be Safe X " .. Eve smiled to herself and started getting ready to her own flight to Rome, hoping for the best not only for herself but also for the woman that slept the night between her arms "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this chapter, from next chapter we are gonna pick up from after the shooting cause Rome was pretty solid. 
> 
> Also keep praying for Mom and sister cause they still have covid, Be Safe ♥️


	8. All Roads Lead To Rome

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A recap of what happened from the gunshot till Eve went back to work and Villanelle knew she was alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternating POVs, sorry if it got confusing i tried to give them both equal amounts of processing.

Villanelle's POV 

Rome was a disaster, an utter failure, a Fuck up that has no match in Villanelle's records .. Her perfect unshakeable record .. Villanelle expected some difficulties, she knew Aron wasn't easy to fuck with but she had no problem killing him anyway .. she was so ready for such possibility that it didn't even need second guessing when he asked her to kill Eve for his entertainment. 

She killed for Eve, that was expected .. Eve killed for her absolutely not expected, She was about to get killed by Raymond the lowest of the handlers, definitely unacceptable .. She was abandoned by Konstantin for his shithead daughter, huge betrayal. 

Villanelle's mind kept going through the events analyzing and analyzing all the way through the tunnel .. Eve was quiet but also determined, that was normal for a first kill Villanelle thought .. what didn't seem normal to Villanelle is how angry Eve got when she knew Villanelle had a gun all along. 

Villanelle could swear that she totally forgot about the gun, she could say she found it somewhere in the tunnel but this just wasn't the truth .. she wanted Eve to try, Eve said that she wanted to know how it felt like and that was a great chance .. like that's just Raymond it didn't even seem like a big deal, he's the worst and it's not like he wasn't strangling the life out of her anyway. 

It was nice seeing Eve kill for her with such furiousty but it was equally painful to see the disappointment in her face when she knew Villanelle " Manipulated " her into killing him .. it was even more hurtful when her last attempt to save the situation by declaring that she loves Eve was rejected, badly rejected .. She had to inflict pain in return. 

The gunshot was fast, muted almost blind .. but once it left the gun once Eve fill on the floor Villanelle knew that she only inflicted pain on herself .. she tried to walk away from her shame but every inch away from Eve made her ache more, she almost wanted to throw up. 

She found the closest public phone and called the ambulance for Eve .. watched as they took her away and knew that Eve was wrong, she did know what love is but maybe just too late. 

Eve's POV

Eve didn't feel the gunshot, she heard the sound and she saw the aim but she didn't feel the bullet entering her .. she didn't hear the ambulance or feel the act of being transferred but she woke up in a small hospital alone with pain all over her body. 

There were two cops in front of her door, she tried to fix her position to see more but her shoulder screamed .. then everything came back, slaughtering Aron, stabbing Raymond with an axe, the gun, the yelling and the shot .. How weird it was that people always say you don't hear the bullet that kills you !! so how come she is still alive ?! Villanelle shot her, she shot her and she said she loved her .. Eve trusted her not to shoot, she was so confident that she gave Villanelle her back !! Villanelle the assassin !! How dumb of her ?! 

Carolyn secretly found her an apartment in a lost place in London, she knew nothing about Niko or kenny or even Hugo who she left for the dead to go save Villanelle, How fucked up were her priorities to do such thing !! 

She found a job in a korean restaurant and ached for home .. She thought of calling her mom but she didn't even know who she is to know who is mom, she was hiding in the kitchen of the restaurant, she was hiding in the supermarkets, she was hiding in the streets she didn't know who was she hiding from or who wasn't she hiding from but she knew that the one she wanted to hide away from most was herself. 

She looked at her wound after 3 months of avoiding it, it was still red, it still hurt .. not as much as before physically but way more emotionally, it was Villanelle who did this to her .. the same Villanelle she made love with, the same Villanelle that slept on her chest like a baby .. that was the very same Villanelle that left her for dead, she's not gonna check out the wound again she won't think of her again .. Ever. 

Villanelle's POV

Sex, Money and New clothes .. those were Villanelle's usual distractions, it always helped her to fuck her anger out but every fluid that touched her fingers every drip that touched her tongue felt as thick as Eve's blood .. she wanted to throw up. 

4 months and she had to work again or she herself will be killed, she lost her appetite .. she was making a scene for Eve and now that she's not here she kinda doesn't want to do it at all .. she finished her jobs and drank her way through the nights till she woke up one-day and found that she proposed to a spanish lady she met in a bar and fucked till the morning just because her hair looked like Eve. 

Eve's POV

4 months and Eve was finally contacted by anyone she knew .. Kenny reached out to her and came to see her, he freaked her out of her nap and held her hand when she cried .. he didn't belong to all this ugliness she thought. 

Villanelle's POV

4 months and a day Villanelle was getting married to a woman she barely knew, lying about where they met, making up a story about shoes that didn't exist, giving a toast about an ex she never stopped thinking about even in her own wedding .. People danced and she thought of Rome. 

Eve's POV

4 months and a half Eve was invited to visit kenny in his new work .. Good for him for leaving that cave she thought, there was no sign of him in the office despite of the fact that his mobile was there, kenny never left his mobile .. she thought something was odd but not so odd that Kenny would be free falling in front of the window, Eve felt paralysed then she ran, she ran to a dead bleeding kenny .. sweet suffering kenny who had no chance of a normal life since he was put in carolyn's womb .. she called carolyn then left to hide. 

Kenny's funeral felt like his birthday, people were dressed in black but no one looked a bit sad .. Eve felt disgusted, at Carolyn at everyone and at herself.

Carolyn told her that Villanelle was back in the field .. she is getting higher in the ranks, and that's there chance to get to the twelve, she felt suffocated .. she escaped to go see a Niko who was even more miserable than her .. what has she done ?! 

Villanelle POV

5 months since Rome and Villanelle has no idea about her wife, no courage to check if Eve was alive or not, no appetite to kill and no plan to protect herself if Helen decided to kill her right here right now in her office. 

Both POV

6 months .. Eve was back at work despite not being able to forget about Rome .. Konstantin told Villanelle that Eve was still alive and she was on a plane to London but she thought of Rome .. Both Eve and Villanelle tried so bad to forget about Rome and what happened before it, they tried to forget the domesticity, the softness and the glimpses of love that they felt .. they tried so hard to forget the hurt and the blood and the pain but the harder they tried to forget the more all ways led to Rome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it .. sorry if it was sad, brighter chapters are coming i promise. 
> 
> Also come say hi on twitter i am really friendly @AWomanStabbedMe


	9. Admit it Eve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God bless the bus and what happened after

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day babies, I hope you enjoy this chapter

Life wasn't easy, Eve knew that since she was a child .. She had parents who always wanted her to be the best, she knew they wanted her best interest at heart but it didn't make it any easier. 

Then she started having bosses that also expected her to be the best version she could be but by this time that was what she expected from life so having to always be perfect or at least act perfect was technically her life style. 

Then came Villanelle, a force of nature, a walking living chaos and she ruined all of this, she didn't demand perfection from her and that fucked up all her calculations .. She made Eve act like her true self, the self she neglected for years and years not to piss her parents and then not to piss her teachers and then not to piss Niko, Villanelle accepted her when she was most chaotic .. she love her through her drunk nights and murder days .. or at least loved her. 

Eve's feelings towards the shooting was vague by then, she was back to her mundane life and somewhere really deep down she missed Villanelle but that missing was buried under piles and piles of anger, hatred, frustration and hurt. 

So what she wasn't expecting is to see Villanelle the very moment she was thinking about her as if she was a demon and she summoned her into existence, so when Villanelle casually said hi that was that for Eve she started to blindly attack Villanelle on a public bus and she wanted Villanelle to attack her too, to hurt her more so that she might stop missing her. 

She slapped her on the face for a reaction way stronger than she intended and Villanelle didn't even get mad at her .. she smiled as she led her to the back of the bus and that made every ounce of negative feeling start to crumble despite of Eve's mental fight with it to stay. 

Villanelle got on top of her and she smelled exceptionally good, despite the fact that she was wearing a ridiculous over-sized suit that would only look good on Villanelle, They looked at each other for a while then Villanelle broke the silence .. 

Villanelle :- " Smell me Eve, What do I smell like to you ?! " 

In any other situation Eve would have laughed on such a question but Villanelle Really did smell like hurt and pain but also victory and maybe love so her heart was ahead of her brain when she just crashed their lips together not caring about the poor commuters, the past or even the future .. she missed Villanelle's lips and that's where she went. 

They were still soft, still full and still welcoming despite the fact that they felt slightly unsure that they barely returned the kiss but they still felt like home .. the kiss lasted for seconds but Eve felt alive as if she was in a long unending night and suddenly the sun decided to rise. 

But her brain kicked in and her ego felt hurt by accepting Villanelle again that fast so she head-butted her so hard that her own head started bounding and because Villanelle was so out of control after the kiss, like her chest was heaving during the kiss and she wasn't even breathing well Eve expected a payback for this change in character but there was non. 

Villanelle left the bus as quietly as she entered and everything returned to normal, as if she was a ghost only Eve could see and through the back glass she saw a genuine smile on Villanelle's face and she knew that she wasn't the only one struggling with her emotions .. Villanelle missed her too, she missed her so much that she didn't want to hurt her any further, not even as a defense .. and once again Villanelle was letting Eve be herself, her true conflicted self and she not only accepted her through it but also loved her through it and that made Eve's head hurt even more. 

Her day at work wasn't any easier, everyone had questions even if they didn't dare to ask them .. even her mind had questions, why didn't Villanelle hit her ?! Why was she so nice ?! Why was she even back ?! And why now ?! Could they fix what has been broken in Rome ?! Does Villanelle want to fix it ?! What does it mean to fix it ?! She felt like she could write a whole book full of questions that had no answers. 

She walked home at nine and when she entered her apartment she could swear she still smelled Villanelle, her strong yet fragile scent and she missed her despite of everything so she sat down on her bed and heard a faint sound that was about to give her a heart attack, it was indeed villanelle's but she didn't see her anywhere .. she kept looking and found a pink Teddy Bear who was dressed like a princess .. she pressed on it and it said " Admit it Eve, you wish I was here " ... God she did she did wish Villanelle was here but she was too scared of herself to admit that, she was scared to give in to the truth that she too loves Villanelle .. she repeated the record over and over till she was sure she didn't miss a breath on it, she kept it close to her heart and laid down on her bed and wished for the day to end. 

Villanelle :- " God Eve you're desperate ... " 

Eve :- " Jesus Villanelle, I knew I smelled a rat here .. " 

Villanelle :- " Come on Eve don't blame that on me !! your apartment is a mess, i did too much cleaning i don't do that usually. " 

Villanelle sat on a chair in the corner of the room and Eve stayed on the bed but now she was setting .. the air was thick with tension but no one wanted to address it, at least not yet. 

Eve :- " Well I had to live in a shitty apartment to be safe so whose fault is that ?! " 

" Carolyn's ?! " Said Villanelle with eyes as innocent as ever and Eve laughed, she laughed for the first time in months and it felt good. 

When Eve was done laughing she said a simple " Maybe ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Or maybe it was my fault ?! " 

Villanelle was all serious now and her voice became much sadder. 

Eve :- " I think it won't be fair to say it's all yours, maybe it was mine too you know .. apparently i am not that good at making the right choices i guess " 

Villanelle :- " Well if it would help I made way stupider choices than you .. " 

Eve :- " Yeah, indeed you did " 

The elephant in the room got too big it almost suffocated them and crashed the building so Villanelle adjusted herself and said " I know .. I know Eve, and I am sorry .. i really am, in Rome the things i did, they're unforgivable and I am just here to say that I am sorry I made you kill raymond, I am sorry Rome failed and I am most sorry for shooting you. " 

A tear escaped Eve's eye and Villanelle didn't dare to get closer and wipe it. 

Eve :- " We're awful people .. " 

Villanelle's eyes were glossy now but she said sarcastically " Well I am sure I am, don't know about you " 

Eve :- " I mean I stabbed you first right, and I killed Raymond and I left hugo to die that makes someone pretty bad " 

" But in your defense you can still count your mistakes on one hand so you still got a chance to run I guess. " shrugged Villanelle 

Eve :- " God you really have a unique way of viewing things. " 

Villanelle smiled proudly but then sadness took over her again " But not Rome Eve, that was really my mistake .. I really care that you know that I am sorry, even if I try to ruin it with my stupid jokes .. when I called the ambulance I prayed to a god I didn't even believe in that you survive, the bullet wasn't meant to kill you Eve .. I know how to kill and I didn't want to kill you, I know that it doesn't make it any better .. I hurt you and that was bad enough so I am sorry. " 

Eve :- " You called the ambulance ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Yes, I had too .. it could've been too late if i waited for someone to see you .. i didn't dare to look at you like that. " 

Now Villanelle was the one who couldn't control her tears. 

Eve :- " Thank you I guess, you know it takes time to forgive right ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Yeah I know and I'm going to wait Eve as long as you want .. but I am no longer chasing you, I am no longer spying and getting into your apartment uninvited. " 

" So no more Teddy Bears and perfumes " laughed Eve 

Villanelle laughed too and wiped her tears " Well you can still have that if you liked it " 

Eve :- " I won't deny you have taste. " 

Villanelle :- " Oh, I am flattered Agent Polastri" "

Eve :- " God don't call me that, I am not a Polastri anymore. " 

Villanelle :- " Mustach divorced you ?!!! What an idiot " 

Eve :- " Not yet but It's better this way, I guess we never were on the same page anyway and i harmed him a lot " 

Villanelle nodded and knew Eve didn't want to bring Gemma up, they already had so much on their plate to solve and yes Gemma was a huge topic but just not yet. 

Eve :- " So what now Villanelle ?! " 

Villanelle :- " I don't know yet but I am going to be there when you forgive me. " 

Eve :- " And till then ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Till then I have a huge thing i need to take care off i will be away for awhile " 

Eve :- " A new target ?! It never takes you that long ! " 

Villanelle " No, not this time. " 

Eve :- " Is it dangerous ?! " 

Villanelle :- " No, maybe .. I don't know yet, but I will go tonight to bully Konstantin into helping me with it. " 

Eve :- " Oh, So it's big. " 

Villanelle :- " Not really .. don't worry Eve, I will be careful." 

" I hope so. " said Eve with a smile and Villanelle felt there was nothing more to say now, so she stood up and say " Now I have to go annoy konstantin the rest of the night, Are you gonna be okay Eve ?! " 

Eve :- " Yes, I will .. don't worry, em and .. and good luck with whatever you have coming " 

Villanelle :- " Thanks Eve, I promise I'll tell you all about it when I come back, have a good night. " 

And with that Villanelle was gone again, leaving Eve with more questions but at least she answered the most important one .. Villanelle was still in love with her and she was willing to wait, but was Eve willing to actually forgive and leave her life behind and maybe be with Villanelle ?! That was a huge question she wasn't ready to answer yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I am just reflecting on things that already happened but stay with me till we go to the bridge ... 
> 
> Thanks for your comments and Kudos 
> 
> Stay safe X


	10. Back to where we started

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reflecting on Poland/Russia and the way to the ballroom ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternating POVs cause both of them went through a lot, now that I think about it S3 was hella heavy.

Eve's POV 

Eve never had a problem with loneliness, but since Villanelle left her that night she felt alone .. But the worst part of being alone with a mind like hers is that she started to doubt every decision she made, not just since paris but back when she accepted carolyn's offer. 

What was she doing ?! Where is her husband ?! Where is she going with her life ?! Is she doing this, Is she leaving everything behind and running with an assassin ?! She loves Villanelle but is she willing to go down that road with her, a road she knew will inevitably end in blood and death !! 

Eve had a last chance to leave all of that behind her, she can cut it all off and go back to being the good person she was, she has a last chance to tame the beast that's knocking from the inside of her and her heart can go fuck itself. 

The idea of running kept getting stronger the longer she didn't hear from Villanelle, She missed her she ached for her closeness and humor she longed for her soothing voice to calm her mind and reassure her but Villanelle wasn't here not today and not the day that followed so she decided to go see Niko in poland, they have been texting lately and maybe just maybe he could take her back .. Even if she doesn't really want him to but he seemed like her only chance to go back to what was safe. 

So she flew to Poland and hoped for the best, and as if life was just waiting her to come to Poland so that it would give her a final warning that this wasn't her life, the moment she saw Niko someone stabbed him in the neck and she stopped breathing. 

She felt frozen for a moment, or a decade but then she had no choice but to come back, she thought of Villanelle but she knew in her heart it wasn't her so she called the ambulance anyway and promised herself that if Niko survive she will leave him alone for his own sake ... But being the stubborn person she was she visited him after he got out of the ICU and he told her to go fuck off so she knew that this time it was final. 

Getting out of the hospital Eve felt truly free, her past life rejected her and that was exactly what she wanted, She knew she wanted Villanelle but she was too scared to admit it to herself or even worse to Villanelle but life seemed to be making the final call for her anyway and she wasn't going to resist anymore. 

Villanelle POV 

Villanelle wasn't sure why after all this time she was interested in searching for her family, She knew that what happened with Eve in paris changed something inside her .. As if it cracked the wall she has built around herself and her world, not a big crack just a little bit, just a small crack that made her want things other than money and clothes .. It made her want not just Eve but also a sense of family. 

The closest to a family she ever had was those people she left behind years ago in Russia, She knew they left her too but she hoped that maybe time has mended what she unconsciously ruined when she was just a little girl. 

So she flew to Russia after bullying Konstantin into telling her as much details as he could, after she killed for him once more .. After Rome she lost her appetite for murder but it felt like a price she had to pay to get the information she felt would fix the void she feels. 

But Russia wasn't the salvation she thought it would be, Her brothers were kind .. they were warm and they gave her the slightest sense of home, But her Mom was as cruel as she remembered .. Her brain wasn't making it up, She wasn't delusional .. Her Mom was cold and mean, And the worst part is that she wasn't done with harming people .. Her little brother was going through the same things she went through when she was his age, He was lonely and he was that close to turn out like her and Oksana didn't like that. 

So she killed her Mom, she burned the house that witnessed her worst nights and she left her brothers enough money to have a new house and to go see Elton, hoping that maybe it wasn't too late to save them from her fate. 

Villanelle was personally free, She always had that fake sense of freedom but since she left Russia she felt truly free .. Free from her past free from her mother and free from her old self. 

But her freedom wasn't complete it left her homeless, She felt void and small .. Controlled by the twelve, by Helen, by Dasha, by Konstantin and even by MI6. 

She was sad and hurt because there was no way out, she told Eve she was willing to wait but she had no more energy within her to fight .. She was entangled in so much drama that she felt it wasn't even fair to drag Eve into her world so she decided despite her heart that she's not going to text Eve when she get back and she's just gonna pray that Eve truly forgives her one-day. 

And as if life hasn't made Villanelle suffer enough, her last operation failed .. for a moment she thought she was going to get killed, cause all her life she knew that if you wasn't the killer you will definitely get killed but despite the fact that every muscle in her begged her to just give up her instinct kicked in and she defended herself and managed to get out with just an arm injury. 

It was the best outcome after such a Fuck up Villanelle knew but she was done, she was done with killing, she was done with living on the run, she was done with the twelve, and maybe she was done with life. 

She slept that day and she dreamt of Eve, She dreamt of home but it was a totally different home, a home that didn't have psychopaths and cruelty a home that only had love and safety and Eve, So she woke up aching for it but she knew she had to find a way out .. a real out. 

Eve POV

After convincing her mind that Niko is not her savior and that her past life is gone for good Eve felt alive again, so she started searching for Villanelle, she followed one lead to the other till it all lead to a forest, a forest where she expected to finally find Villanelle but she ended up finding an injured Dasha and the monster in her kept knocking louder and louder it clouded her mind and she found herself pressing on a dying Dasha's chest with her leg till she heard ribs cracking then she stopped and left her like that with not an ounce of regret. 

Then she was on the road again following Villanelle into a train station but once again she was too late that she only managed to wave at her ignoring a dying Konstantin and a panicked crowd. 

And when she thought she lost Villanelle again her phone rang, a private number so she picked feeling exactly who was on the other side " We have to stop running at each other Eve, it's not good for both of us. " 

Eve :- " You're such a fucking tease Villanelle, why didn't you call me ?! " 

Villanelle :- " I am sorry Eve, things got way too complicated. " 

Eve :- " Oh, I am sorry ... Are you okay ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Yeah yeah don't worry about me. " 

Eve :- " Where are you heading to ?! " 

Villanelle :- " Not so far, I will text you the location of a place I go to every once in a while .. I think it will be safe to meet there. " 

Eve :- " Safe ?! Are you in danger ?! " 

Villanelle :- " I am always in danger Eve, but no I just want to be careful. " 

Eve :- " Ok, send me the address I will meet you there. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and sorry if you hate the throwback thing I couldn't jump over all that drama so i had to reflect on it. 
> 
> Thanks for your comments and Kudos they actually mean a lot


	11. Are you leading or Am I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the train station to the ballroom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a really hard time trying to write this chapter, someone tell me what's the timeline of E8 again cause i am fucking lost man. 
> 
> Also i haven't watched that episode in a really long time for emotional reasons so any mistakes in the conversations is on my laziness.

Villanelle's POV 

Hitting Dasha with a golf stick and leaving her for the dead was not on Villanelle's plan for the day so when it happened Villanelle started improvising, but then everything seemed to get out of hand ... Konstantin had a heart attack and she had to run, she stole a key they were going to use together .. a key to a safe maybe or some box that had some of Konstantin belongings he said, but she knew they were basically money and maybe some passports. 

She got on the train they were supposed to get on together and she felt shitty, she felt as if she was a traitor cause who leaves their friends to die if not a shitty person .. she got settled in her seat while more people gathered around Konstantin and she deeply hoped it wasn't too late .. not because she thought konstantin is now her only family not that at all she thought to herself, it's just that she doesn't want to feel guilty for one more thing when her plate is already flooding. 

She was lost in her thoughts when a running figure appeared, the figure stopped at Konstantin for a moment but then ran to the train and that was definitely Eve, Oh Eve you never give up though Villanelle but she wasn't annoyed she just smiled and waved back at a disappointed Eve. 

Villanelle was scared, she was scared of being alone yes but she was terrified of wanting Eve .. But what was most frightening is the longing she saw on Eve's face, Eve wasn't mad at her for disappearing after Russia, She didn't yell or curse .. she just waved and gave Villanelle an understanding glare. 

Leaving Eve on that station rekindled everything Villanelle tried hardly to bury mostly to protect Eve, from the twelve, from MI6 and also from herself .. but Eve still showed up she was too stubborn to use the chance Villanelle gave her, it was apparent now that Eve is done running from Villanelle and now maybe .. just maybe she is ready to run to her. 

So she found herself calling Eve, and no matter how smug she wanted to sound her voice came out soft .. She missed Eve, she missed being close to her, talking to her and teasing her .. she missed the sex too, but her feelings towards Eve were changed after Russia, at first the chasing was delicious, as delicious as the pain they inflicted on one another .. but now it's the hope of home, the hope of being understood and accepted, it was the safety and the genuine love .. it was the hope and Oksana has long forgotten what hope is. 

So her plans changed once again, she told Eve to meet her in a ballroom she haven't visited in years .. it was the place where everything started, she felt as if she wanted Eve to see it or maybe she wanted to challenge her to stay with all she knows about her .. she wanted her to know the beginning of the story and then decide whether she wants to write the ending or not . 

Villanelle was going to tell her everything, all of it .. she was going to tell her about her mom and how cruel she was, and how lonely she felt in the orphanage, the days she slept hungry because there was no enough food for all the kids, she was going to tell her about the fire that was a cry for help to her mom, and then she can tell her everything about dasha, Konstantin and Nadia and then if Eve accepted all this she will tell her about killing her mom and burning her old home and then she will give her the choice. 

To Villanelle it sounded like she wanted to push Eve away, but deep down she knew she wanted her close, she wanted to protect her so she was giving her a way out but she also knew that she was going to protect Eve with her life if she decided to stay .. she also knew for sure that Eve is not a person she wanted to manipulate nor she wanted to force her to do anything she didn't want to do, she knew she owed Eve at least giving her a choice. 

So she went to her hotel that was quarter an hour away from the ballroom and got changed, she wanted to hide Konstantin's keys and box address but she was too scared that someone would be tracking her so she took them with her and sat there watching the swaying dancers and waiting for Eve to arrive. 

Eve POV 

In the car Eve didn't feel any mercy towards dasha, despite not knowing for sure she just knew that she's one of the reasons villanelle turned out to be the person she is so this was kind of a payback for the young oksana she ruined. 

Killing was not something Eve thought she was able to do, she has always been a viewer .. she was always watching from a far since she started watching crime movies as a child, till she picked her criminology major in college and ending with having her dream job in MI5, But Rome changed so much in her that she no longer knew who she was .. she wasn't even sure if Rome did this to her or was it her nature all along and killing Raymond has just awakened it. 

She knew one thing for sure tho, She knew that the only person who could understand her and also help her without judgment was villanelle and she wasn't going to let her run anymore. 

So she ended up in the train station, acting like a lunatic, asking a dying Konstantin about villanelle and leaving him to death just to wave at a departing villanelle. 

Villanelle looked calmer than usual, and maybe more sad Eve thought and her stomach dropped at that, she felt defeated .. finding villanelle was never an easy challenge and Eve was so tired. 

Then her phone rang and there was villanelle, she tried to sound annoying but underneath that Eve could sense a boiling sadness threatening to erupt so she booked a ticked the minute villanelle sent her the address and she got on the following train. 

The place villanelle told her to go to reminded her of Niko's game nights, the same wooden floor but with a more romantic lighting, soft old music kept getting louder every step she took but not too loud just enough to penetrate one's heart, wooden tables were arranged in a circle surrounding a dance floor that was filled with couples of all ages dancing in great synchronicity as if they have trained on their moves hundreds of times before. 

Everything seemed dull and old unlike villanelle, so the only thing that Eve spotted was villanelle's red suit that didn't belong at all to the place .. Villanelle was setting so still and Eve wondered if she was really still and defenseless or was her mind in a steady mood ready to attack at any moment, and not to take any chances she approched her slowly not to disturb that calmness. 

Eve :- " Villanelle .. " 

Villanelle gave her a small smile and Eve saw her eyes shining with tears threatening to flood. 

Villanelle went on explaining how this place was the first place she killed anyone in, A tango champion she said .. Eve thought villanelle didn't remember or care about the history of her targets, maybe she was wrong she thought. 

Villanelle fell back in her silence, she was watching the dancers so closely as if she was trying to memorize every move and every breath, Eve didn't know wether villanelle was really interested in dancing or was she lost in her own thoughts so she told her about Niko and how dasha tried to blame it on her. 

Villanelle didn't seem to listen, as if she knew Eve would never believe that so she didn't have to defend herself or maybe she was just so tired to do so. 

Eve :- " Are you even listening to me ?! " 

Villanelle proceeded on how she liked those dancers, how she thought they were care free and how badly she wanted to feel like them, Eve was surprised by the sudden softness .. Villanelle looked small and tired, Eve wished she could just hug her .. tell her that it's gonna be fine. 

At first it sounded like a bad idea, hugging someone like villanelle suddenly when they're on the verge of a breakdown could not be the best followed protocol, but she knew she had to comfort her someway and then came a brilliant man asking them to join the others on the dance floor and that sounded like a really good idea to get closer to villanelle but not too close to scare her into her cocoon again. 

Villanelle :- " Dancing is not my thing. " 

Eve was a good dancer, she was so fun at parties .. she mastered all kinds of dancing, she even took ballet classes when she was young, " Mine neither but it's good to try new things " she headed towards the dance floor before villanelle could notice the lie. 

Villanelle followed her despite of her apparent discomfort, she stood in front her fidgeting awkwardly waiting for some hint of what to do next .. Eve was the one to take the first step and put her hand on villanelle's back and villanelle imitated her .. then she took her other hand in hers and tried to search for a rhythm. 

Despite being so chaotic villanelle tried to take control in something she didn't even know what to do, " Are you leading or am I ?! " Came in a motherly tone as if Eve was disciplining villanelle and Eve expecting some fighting back but it never came, Villanelle released control she let Eve lead and her eyes became less sad for a moment. 

" Do you want to be like that ?! " Came suddenly and Eve took a moment to understand what villanelle was asking, " God No. " Was Eve's first answer once she saw a dull ordinary couple and suddenly thought of Niko. 

Villanelle :- " Why not ?! " 

Eve :- " We can never last that long, we would consume each other by then " 

" It sounds kind of nice. " came soft and needy and Eve felt quite guilty for her dry answer but that wasn't really what she meant .. she just wanted to tell villanelle that she was so done with dullness and that villanelle herself was far from dull but so many words seemed to be lost in translation so Eve scooted closer to villanelle's chest. 

Villanelle's breath was warm against her head, the calm rising of her chest softly hugged her with every breath villanelle took and Eve felt safe, she felt that maybe their closeness told villanelle what she couldn't put in words. 

Villanelle :- " I've killed so many people Eve. " 

Eve could tell from the tensing in her shoulders that villanelle's mind was having a crisis, she felt as if villanelle had hundreds of words to say but her tongue only produced that phrase so the only answer Eve could give her was " I know. " And she hoped that this was the right answer because she didn't want to add to villanelle's sadness anymore. 

It seemed to be so because Villanelle's arms relaxed immediately and she buried her head in Eve's hair, Eve sighed and closed her eyes to save this moment of pure understanding between the two of them but once again Villanelle tensed and before Eve could ask what happened Villanelle softly pushed her away " You have to go, our party is getting crashed " .. Eve tried to find the reason why Villanelle was so distressed but she didn't have the time cause Villanelle gave her a folded paper that had what looked like a key inside it and pushed her to go. 

Villanelle POV 

Villanelle hated Rhian the moment she met her but today after ruining her first dance with Eve she became her worst enemy, so after she made sure Eve was safe, she switched into game face again .. she knew that Rhian wasn't here to dance, she was here to take her back to Helen who was definitely not pleased with Villanelle's last fuck up, so Villanelle knew that she had to find a way out of Rhian's grip before she handle her to Helen who might handle her to someone worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it, i just enjoy analyzing scenes that already exist way too much.


	12. Never look back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From killing Rhian to killing Eve's monster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how we survived the bridge scene but they ain't got no business doing us like that. 
> 
> I love reflecting on what already happened so here's one more chapter of that Enjoy.

Villanelle POV 

Villanelle hated Rhian the moment she met her but today after ruining her first dance with Eve she became her worst enemy, so after she made sure Eve was safe, she switched into game face again .. she knew that Rhian wasn't here to dance, she was here to take her back to Helen who was definitely not pleased with Villanelle's last fuck up, so Villanelle knew that she had to find a way out of rhian's grip before she handle her to Helen who might handle her to someone worse. 

Dancing with Eve was the only good thing that happened in villanelle's week, or maybe month .. Her life has been a series of unfortunate events lately but the moment she put her hand on Eve's back, the moment she held her hand and smelled her hair everything felt so simple, so serene. 

On the contrary Rhian was in a very bad mood, maybe because she found villanelle intimidating or maybe that's how she was built , villanelle wasn't sure but all she knew is that her mood was finally good again and she felt like fucking with Rhian at least until her head produced a plan. 

Rhian was easy to fuck with but it wasn't as easy to figure out what to actually do with her, the old villanelle could've killed Rhian by now but this villanelle that lost her appetite for murder had no idea what to do .. how to get away from Rhian without a murder, lucky for her Rhian answered the question when she attacked her .. That's when villanelle knew that Rhian's strong facade was to hide that she can't compete with villanelle, even when she was chocking her it was obvious that her muscles wasn't as strong as villanelle's .. But what was more obvious is that she wasn't half smart as villanelle, because if the roles were reversed villanelle would have never thrown a tantrum for something as stupid as teasing she thought.

Villanelle :- " I am sorry. " 

Rhian :- " What ?! " 

Villanelle knew she should finish her, that she can't get away from Rhian without getting her hands dirty one more time and that pissed her off so she started hitting Rhian as strong as she could .. One hit after another till she started chocking her, the life was getting drained out of Rhian's eyes with every second that passed, the veins in her neck were pulsing under her fingers .. Beat after beat and the beats kept getting louder that villanelle heard them screaming in her ears that she dropped Rhian and felt herself panicking. 

Her head hurt, Rhian's rapid pulse got into her head and didn't seem to leave but she was beyond the point of going back .. She wished she had a gun so that she doesn't have to do it herself but she didn't and she didn't know what to do .. again the world decided for her when it sent the metro underwhich she threw a pleading Rhian. 

Despite not liking it, villanelle felt as if she has restored her powers .. as if some spell stopped her from being the amazing assassin she were and now rhian broke that spell, she usually doesn't question her abilities but since russia and after she fucked up in her last operation and following that brutal meeting with Carolyn Martins she had been slightly shaken, but maybe not anymore. 

Eve POV :- 

Eve had more clarity after the ballroom, she had more purpose .. She felt like she was finally and truly free, she followed the note that villanelle gave her to a strange place but she kept going then she got refered to a weird looking man but she didn't stop, she gave him the number of the box she was searching for and it turned out to be russian so she knew it was whether Villanelle's or Konstantin's box because even Villanelle wasn't that crazy to send her to one of the twelve's boxes. 

" I am not a very nice lady " she said it and she felt it, and she enjoyed the threatened look that covered the creep's face .. he took her seriously once she showed him a glimpse of anger and she thought maybe she should've done this her entire life .. with everyone who questioned her and treated her like a " nice lady " even with her husband who forced her wildness into a cocoon over the years by his normalcy. 

Getting away with the things she found in the box felt too easy, so Eve was alarmed of anything that might come up and it came .. Konstantin was sent back from the dead and the box was obviously his, but she knew that if villanelle wanted her to get the things in it then there must be something important in there and she was willing to protect it until villanelle gets it even if it was gonna cost her her life. 

It didn't cost her her life tho, Konstantin might be alive still but he didn't have the strength nor the energy to fight Eve for his belongings so they settled on calling villanelle .. 

Villanelle :- " Eve I am at your work .. " 

Eve almost laughed knowing how freaked out everyone at the office must be for seeing the legendary villanelle and when villanelle added that they were weird she knew that they were definitely pissing their pants and she felt sorry for them, they agreed on meeting villanelle at a location Konstantin will send her but the box's belongings will stay with Eve. 

The following couple of hours felt like a movie for Eve, yes she was working for MI6 and yes she's chasing an international organization that she doesn't even know their identities and she might have fallen in love with an assassin but the only thing that anchored her was Carolyn .. That strong collected woman that Eve didn't even know whether she was evil or not. 

For Eve Carolyn started as a role model then she turned somehow into some kind of mother figure, so even after her Rome betrayal Eve still had some trust in her but when Eve got into the apartment that Konstantin led her to the air was different .. it was thick with tension and not knowing what to expect. 

Carolyn was apparently pissed, and maybe for the first time she wasn't pissed at neither Eve nor Villanelle, Eve remembered that Villanelle must be on her way and that gave her a glimpse of comfort in that weird situation .. 

Eve :- " I am helping Villanelle .. " 

Carolyn :- " Of course you're. " 

Eve didn't like how this sounded but it was true she was helping her nemesis and carolyn is not a lady to fool so Eve didn't comment on the tone, she didn't even have the time to think much about it cause the bell rang, She opened the door for Villanelle and they stood like little girls on their first day of school till carolyn made them set. 

Eve didn't know whether she scooted closer to Villanelle or it was the other way around but it made her feel less anxious anyway, the situation was so not about them for one time and that made neither Eve nor Villanelle want to pretend to be subtle. 

So when it got bad Villanelle had her hand behind Eve's back and when Konstantin knelt with a gun to his head Villanelle's only instinct was to protect Eve .. Villanelle looked confused and taken aback but she didn't move to protect Konstantin, the only movement she made was to put her hand on Eve's thigh as if to tell her " That's not our war Eve, not anymore " and despite of being firm in her touch she jolted once Konstantin cried for help and then there was a gunshot. 

Villanelle POV 

It was loud, Everything was loud .. Rhian's heartbeat, Konstantin's pleas and the gunshot .. For someone like her gunshots were Mozart but this time was different for two reasons, it was Konstantin who was getting shot and Eve was there .. Eve was a tough woman she knew, it's not her first time in this kind of chaos but Villanelle was genuinely scared not because someone was getting killed tonight but because that was a twelve setting .. it wasn't a chasing game anymore, Eve was too entangled and she hated that for her. 

So when things got bad her hand acted on their own and lied on Eve's thigh, to anchor Eve's impulse to help yes but maybe to comfort herself too and when Konstantin screamed for her to help she didn't even manage to move from Eve's side as if they were glued .. And then the gunshot wasn't Konstantin's. 

There was a hole in Paul's head, a hole Villanelle assumed he didn't see coming because not a single person in the room could have guessed .. Carolyn was a strange unpredictable woman and Villanelle admired that, on the contrary she hated the betrayed look on Konstantin's face when Carolyn told him to leave before she changes her mind. 

Konstantin :- " Are you coming ?! " 

Villanelle :- " No. " 

Konstantin :- " Why Not ?! "

Villanelle :- " You're not family .. " 

It was heavy and brutal but it was honest, he wasn't family since Rome but maybe he wasn't family before either .. She knew that there was two ways to interpret her declaration .. Way one was that she was done with Konstantin and that was obvious to everyone and way two is that she was staying with her home who wasn't carolyn obviously but she was too scared to make it more clear. 

Carolyn :- " It's time to go cold turkey .. " 

Eve :- " What do you mean ?! " 

Carolyn :- " You know precisely what I mean. " 

Villanelle knew exactly what Carolyn was saying, she was saying you two better run cause we're in the endgame now and you are definitely on your own " You should listen to her Eve " she said it once when carolyn told Eve that they can't destroy the twelve and she wanted to say it again to tell her just come with me Eve but Eve didn't seem to get it so she stormed out leaving her confused on what to do next. 

Villanelle :- " I like cold turkey .. " 

Carolyn :- " You should go after her .. " 

And that's what she did, it turned out that Eve was quiet a runner even with that stupid coat on but then she stopped on the bridge and just stood facing the water and the dark night .. So Villanelle decided on approaching with humor to help lighten the mood " Hey, you can be pretty athletic when you choose. " 

Eve :- " I killed dasha " 

It took Villanelle a moment to figure out what Eve was saying " No I killed dasha ... ". 

Eve :- " I crushed her with my foot. " 

" Then I guess we both did, isn't that romantic ?! " Villanelle said sarcastically expecting a stinging come back. 

Eve :- " You know the only people who would think that are ?! 

Villanelle knew that psychopaths were the only possible answer to come but unlike before she was ready to admit it she was ready to be accountable and admit what she was but she wanted Eve to say it anyway " Who ?! " 

Eve :- " Us. " 

It came so simple, so natural and serene that Villanelle felt sad for Eve. 

Villanelle :- " I don't want to do it anymore, all of it. " 

Eve :- " What's happened to us ?! " 

Actually a lot has happened to them, a lot of chasing and stabbing and killing but also a lot of love and forgiveness and protection and now they were having a casual conversation as if they were best friends. 

Eve :- " I had a life, a husband a chicken .. " 

Villanelle :- " And you still want that stuff. " 

Villanelle's stomach panicked everytime Eve mentioned Niko, she knew they were over but she knew that she won't stop Eve if she wanted to go back .. she also knew that he will always be the better spouse to Eve if they ever managed to get to that level. 

Eve :- " When I try and think of my future I just see your face over and over again. " 

And that's when she would cry that's when she rushes to hug the beautiful lady standing in front of her declaring her love to her even if it was so subtle but Villanelle feared that she was reaching maybe this wasn't what Eve meant, maybe she was Eve's nightmare not her dream so she did the only thing she did to protect her feelings " It's a really beautiful face. " came awkward and dumb but it made Eve smile. 

Villanelle :- " Did I ruin your life, do you think I am a monster ?! " 

Eve :- " You're so many things .. " 

Villanelle :- " It doesn't answer my question. " 

And Villanelle knew she didn't want the answer, she knew she asked this question because feeling hurt was way better than feeling loved because love was strange but hurt was so familiar that she found comfort in it. 

" I think we all have monsters inside .. " Came so loving out of Eve's mouth " Some people manage to hide them better than others .. " 

Villanelle :- " well, I haven't " 

Eve :- " Neither did I. " 

Villanelle wanted Eve to be mad at her for waking up this monster but Eve wasn't, she was so in peace that Villanelle was internally pissed that she wanted to stir that peace and get the anger she deserved " I think my monster encourages your monster. " 

Eve :- " I think I Wanted it to. " 

And Villanelle knew that she wasn't getting any hate from Eve tonight, she knew that there was no hate in Eve's heart towards her anymore and she felt scared mostly for Eve the same Eve she wanted to possess couple of months ago. 

Eve :- " Help me .. Help me make it stop. " 

And that hurt, because Eve was crying despite of herself .. tears were running on her cheeks and she asked Villanelle for the one thing she could actually do but would also kill her, she wanted to stop her monster and her monster was fueled by Villanelle's, so she was basically asking Villanelle to help her let go of her and that will most definitely kill Villanelle. 

Eve :- " You will tell me to jump. " 

Villanelle :- " No, you'll die if you jump .. it's easier than that. " 

It wasn't, not for Villanelle at least but for one of them to live and be free the other had to die and Villanelle was willing to do that for Eve, she owed her to kill the monster she awakened. 

" Stand up straight and look at me " she knew it had no purpose she could have told Eve to just leave but she needed to see her face one last time, that expecting hoping face .. the face she loved and chased, the face she brought tears to but lately she brought smiles too .. such a shame she won't be able to do it anymore she thought " Now turn around and face the other way ..I will face this way " and that was her goodbye, the goodbye she didn't dare to say .. Eve looked scared she sounded scared so Villanelle turned around before cancelling the whole thing, she rested her head against Eve's head for a moment and knew it was the last time she will do that so she sighed despite herself. 

Eve :- " Now what ?! " 

Villanelle " Now We walk, and we never look back. " 

Eve :- " But I, I ... " 

Villanelle :- " Don't turn just walk ... "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heartache, that's how I felt rewatching that scene after months of avoiding it god i love them so much imma give them so much softness from now on. 
> 
> Done with the reflecting btw


	13. The bridge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I wanted this and after to be one chapter but I am so hurt over the finale announcement so I felt like writing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am hurt I don't know what to do with my life after the show ends .. Sending love to all who feel the same.

Walking away from Eve was harder than she expected, It felt as if the gravity just became stronger that it pains her legs to walk .. Even the wind that was calm at the beginning of the night started to become stronger and made it harder to walk .. To say that every step she took felt like years of travelling would be an understatement .. Villanelle felt utterly and painfully alone, she felt homeless she felt more abandoned than the night her mom left her at the orphanage But this time the intentions were good .. She hoped they were good she hoped Eve knew they were good. 

Eve was obviously hurt but this was for the best, maybe in the future when she have a better more sane life she will thank her or maybe she won't remember her at all and she will not ache. 

Just keep walking Villanelle Just keep walking, you're good at walking .. you walked earlier than any kid in your family, you had years of training on how to walk when in disguise on how to run on how to know if some is behind .. And Eve wasn't behind anymore, the warmth of her kept fading and maybe she is now too far to look back maybe now Eve is free. 

Despite of her will to leave and never look back villanelle's heart was aching to look back just one more time just one more glance .. So she decided that one more look won't harm, it's not like she will call out for Eve or anything, just one more time to be sure that she left. 

So she took a deep breath and turned back, And there was Eve looking at her with blame and hurt .. She didn't know what to do or whether she was supposed to walk back to Eve or just continue on her way but Eve didn't give her much choice cause now her sadness turned into anger and she was fastly walking towards villanelle. 

" What the fuck was that villanelle ?! Are you fucking kidding me ?! " Said Eve pushing villanelle angrily. 

Eve :- " Like were you seriously planning to leave ?! To never look back and go to Cuba or Alaska or wherever the fuck you were planning to go. " 

Villanelle :- " I, I just wanted ... " 

Eve :- " You wanted what villanelle, you wanted me to fuck off .. you should've just said that. " 

Eve was going from angry to hurt again and her eyes started to shine with new tears threatening to fall. 

Villanelle :- " No Eve no, I never wanted you to leave .. You asked me to make your monster stop. " 

Eve :- " So you decided on leaving me alone with it .. Let it engulf me, That was the best solution you could figure out ?! " 

Villanelle :- " I don't know Eve, all I know is that I want to protect you no matter how much it will hurt me. " 

Eve :- " If you really want to protect me then you stay with me, you know the only times when my monster don't dare to act up ... The only times I feel like it's not even there, is when I am with you villanelle .. and now that I am done running you want to leave. " 

Eve's voice broke on the last sentence and she started crying, villanelle didn't know what to say and how to fix something she didn't even know was wrong so she put her hand on Eve's cheek and kissed her. 

She kissed her softly and Eve sighed into the kiss as if she was releasing all hurt, they kept exchanging soft kisses and sighs for a while and Villanelle felt as if this was her first kiss ever, as if her lips were only created to kiss Eve's and after years of detours she's finally home. 

The kisses started getting deeper and Eve got her tongue into villanelle's mouth and villanelle forgot all about the bridge and passerbys until a boomer started whistling " Get a room dykes ". 

Villanelle was done with people ruining her moments with Eve and she was ready to fight until Eve put her hand on her chest and said " It's not worth it. " And her anger evaporated. 

She looked at her hand on Eve's cheek and Eve has looking at her intently not saying anything and suddenly her smile got calmer and she looked villanelle in the eye and said " I love you Oksana, I've loved you since day one but I was too scared to admit it that i stabbed you to conviene myself I hated you but I didn't .. I loved you all along. " 

Tears were rolling on Villanelle's cheek before she even noticed .. Her mind was still processing but her heart felt it and it was flooded was warmth and she smiled widely at Eve .. and as if Eve knew how much the moment meant for villanelle she looked like she didn't expect a reply she just put a small kiss on Villanelle's cheek and said " Now do you have a room somewhere or should we go sleep at jamie's ?! " 

Villanelle :- " No, no I have a good room with a king size bed you will love it .. wait Who's jamie, Have you been cheating on Mr Polastri and me Eve ?! " 

Eve parked a laugh at that and villanelle's heart skipped a beat, the tears were long gone " The hotel isn't far so we don't have to call an Uber or something .. Or are you tired I mean we can call one If ... " 

Eve :- " No, no I can walk .. I mean carolyn ruined my knees and you dick ruined my feet but I am recovered now. " 

Villanelle :- " Mmm, I guess someone got magical lips. " 

Eve :- " Oh Fuck off .. " 

Villanelle :- " They're pretty magical tho .. " 

Eve :- " Just a little bit yes. " 

They fell silent after that, but the silence was comfortable it was calm and loving and villanelle wanted to feel it her entire life, Eve was walking beside her following her steps and stealing glances every now and then and since Eve was the one who said the I love you villanelle felt like it was her turn so she started to " accidentally " touch Eve's hand .. Eve seemed to be happy she started smiling then villanelle intertwined their fingertips together. 

" Well You can do better than that, can't you ?!" Said Eve looking teasingly at Villanelle. 

Villanelle grinned and firmly held Eve's hand " This feels nice " 

" Yeah, It's very nice. " Said Eve softly pressing on villanelle's hand. 

The walking after that felt different, it had purpose and meaning, it wasn't lonely anymore it felt as if they were going home even if they were on the run .. it felt like anywhere with Eve was home even the night streets and from home they could figure anything out or at least try but together nothing to be done alone anymore always together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this short glimpse of softness there will be more until i heal from that news.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't know where I am going with this but I think there will be more, any suggestions are welcomed 
> 
> * Stay safe *


End file.
